I dreamed of dancing white horses, bright on a warm and dim stage
Rhythmic and beautiful,
But you called me away.
As I left, backstage, a magnificent white horse grasped my finger and bit.
He would not let go. A girl with sad eyes was sitting on his back.
They both so wanted me to stay! But you called me away to an urgent door.
When I opened the door there was only an empty, cobwebbed cupboard.
I was so surprised.
It turned dark. I was in a crowd, watching chanting monks
They began to tear lambs apart, and threw them into the crowd for us to eat.
Disgusted, I felt I was eating my own warm viscera.
A self-devouring sacrifice.
A woman was in the audience, mechanically cutting a man’s throat over and over
With a boxcutter.
I was lying in my bed alone. A man walked past in the passageway. The one the woman killed. He is holding a dead body in front of him, like a puppet, like a persona. Cutting its throat with a box cutter.
That is when I started to make my lover,
limb by limb,
out of the air.
That is when my lover began to come to life beside me.